Life as a Single mom..

Shower Cap...Thinking Cap?

2007-05-15T15:28:00.000-05:00

You might be wondering what in the world could this possibly be about? Let me explain...

As any mother knows, finding "quiet" time to think after having children, is definitely hard to come by. Being a single mom of 3, now that brings a whole new scale into play...slim to none. There is one place that never lets me down. That place is the bathroom. Not just the bathroom, more specifically the shower.

It is the one place that I can actually think. Some of my greatest ideas have come from within the walls of the shower. Even as I sit to jot this down before I forget, it is slowly starting to fade away. The kids have come in at least 6 times in the last 5 minutes. My sister is here waiting until we have boy scouts in 45 minutes, of which she is just as interruptive as the children. All I ask is for 10 minutes, just 600 seconds to have my moment and make sure I get it all down.

I'm not sure as to why taking a shower is so productive, well at least to me personally. Maybe it's because it is the one image a child rarely wants to remember of their mother. Or maybe it's because it is one of the moments when children know that they have full control over the house. It makes no difference what the reason, I'm just thankful for the time it gives me.

So if you are in a rut, or you just simply need a break, try taking a shower...It always works for me.

What Kind Of Mom Are You?

2007-05-15T11:41:00.000-05:00

Are You a Slacker Mom?

Bring it on Mom

You my dear, are the envy of all your friends. You roll with the punches. Gum in you hair? You know peanut butter is just the thing to get it out. With a roll of duct tape for any emergency and lots of love, there's nothing you can't do for your kids.

Take more free personality quizzes

2007-05-11T01:07:00.000-05:00

Oh so pretty and so innocent...and then they grow up! This is a photo taken of my 6 year old when she was only a few months old.

I was invited to join in on a wonderful contest. Check it out here.

The winner will get a Pro membership at greetingflix.com

My Moment...

2007-05-09T17:43:00.000-05:00

The wonderful ladies over at Maya's Mom have again gave us "moms" a reason to really look inside ourselves and cherish every little moment that we have. We are to write a little something about what our favorite moment of the day was. So, here is mine...

Today was actually a day full of moments... I have been just a little on the busy side lately, so much that I still have to do. Well today, I was able to get the majority of it all done, and that feels awesome. But that's not all...

Brenden & Brianna woke up this morning with no struggles what-so-ever, ready to go to school. So I was left with only myself and Alyssa at home. Alyssa was still sleeping as they left for school, so I figured I would take advantage of the quiet morning to jump start my day. She ended up sleeping until 10:15. I was able to start the day with 2 full hours of uninterrupted work.

Then, my sister came over to help with Alyssa and go to the grocery store for me. (I don't care to go to the store either way, so that in itself was definitely worth the moment.) And that's not all...She then picked my kids up from school, and took Alyssa and they all went to Grandma's house to play.

I had the entire day all to myself! I have not been this "kid free" for a long, long time. I also spent the entire afternoon on a Work At Home Expo that was just fantastic. I learned so many things they I have been trying to get started for some time now, I met many great ladies, and quite possibly gained myself a couple team members as well.

So I have to say, there was no possible way I could slim "my moment" down to just one. Well, at least not on a day like today.

How popular is your name?

2007-05-07T12:03:00.000-05:00

HowManyOfMe.com

There is
1
person with my name
in the U.S.A.

How many have your name?

You know you’re a mother when…

2007-05-07T01:24:00.000-05:00

You automatically double-knot everything you tie.

You find yourself humming the Barney song as you do the dishes.

You hear a baby cry in the grocery store, and you start to gently sway back and forth, back and forth. However, your children are at school!

You actually start to like the smell of strained carrots mixed with applesauce.

You weep through the scene in Dumbo when his mom is taken away, not to mention what Bambi does to you.

You get soooo into crafts you contemplate writing a book called 101 Fun Crafts to do with Dryer Lint and Eggshells.

You spend a half hour searching for your sunglasses only to have your teenager say, "Mom, why don't you wear the ones you pushed up on your head?"

You are out for a nice dining with your friends, enjoying some real adult conversation, when suddenly you realize that you've reached over and started to cut up their steaks!

Your feet stick to the kitchen floor.....and you don't care.

When the kids are fighting, you threaten to lock them in a room together and not let them out until someone's bleeding.

You can't find your cordless phone, so you ask a friend to call you, and you run around the house madly, following the sound until you locate the phone downstairs in the laundry basket.

You spend an entire week wearing sweats.

Your idea of a good day is making it through without a child leaking bodily fluids on you.

Popsicles become a food staple.

Your favorite television show is a cartoon.

Peanut butter and jelly is eaten at least in one meal a day.

You're willing to kiss your child's boo-boo, regardless of where it is.

Your baby's pacifier falls on the floor and you give it back to her, after you suck the dirt off of it because you're too busy to wash it off.

Your kids make jokes about farting, burping, pooping, etc. and you think it's funny.

You're so desperate for adult conversation that you spill your guts to the telemarketer that calls and HE hangs up on YOU!

Spit is your number one cleaning agent.

You're up each night until 10 PM vacuuming, dusting, wiping, washing, drying, loading, unloading, shopping, cooking, driving, flushing, ironing, sweeping, picking up, changing sheets, changing diapers, bathing, helping with homework, paying bills, budgeting, clipping coupons, folding clothes, putting to bed, dragging out of bed, brushing, chasing, buckling, feeding (them, not you), PLUS swinging, playing baseball, bike riding, pushing trucks, cuddling dolls, roller balding, basketball, football, catch, bubbles, sprinklers, slides, nature walks, coloring, crafts, jumping rope, PLUS raking, trimming, planting, edging, mowing, gardening, painting, and walking the dog. You get up at 5:30 AM and you have no time to eat, sleep, drink or go to the bathroom, and yet...you still managed to gain 10 pounds.

In your bathroom there is toothpaste on the light fixtures, water all over the floor, a dog drinking out of the toilet and body hair forming a union to protest unsafe working conditions.

You buy cereal with marshmallows in it.

The closest you get to gourmet cooking is making rice crispies bars

Someday when my children are old enough to understand the logic that motivates a parent, I will tell them...

2007-05-07T01:14:00.000-05:00

I loved you enough to ask where you are going, with whom, and what time you would be home.

I loved you enough to insist that you save your money and buy a bike for yourself even though I could afford to buy one for you.

I loved you enough to be silent and let you discover that your new best friend was a jerk.

I loved you enough to make you pay for the toy you had taken and tell the clerk' " I stole this yesterday, and I want to pay for it."

I loved you enough to stand over you for two hours while you cleaned your room, a job that should have taken 15 minutes.

I loved you enough to let you see anger, disappointment, and tears in my eyes. Children should know that their parents aren't perfect.

I loved you enough to let you assume the responsibility for your actions even when the penalties were so harsh, they almost broke my heart.

But most of all, I loved you enough to say NO when I knew you would hate me for it. …

Those were the most difficult battles of all. I am glad I won them, because in the end, you won too . And someday when your children are old enough to understand the logic that motivates parents, you will tell them.

The Single Mom on Mothers Day...

2007-05-05T02:33:00.000-05:00

As a single parent, they are many different things that just don't work out the same way as they would if there were two parents involved. Mothers Day is one of those times. Granted I love mothers day. It gives me the sympathy tool to use against my children in hopes that if they even start to act up, I can quickly halt it with a simple,"do you remember what today is?" (It gets em' every time...) Yet, when your children are young, there isn't much they will know to do, or are allowed to do alone without some sort of assistance from an adult. So all of those wonderful Mother's Day presents that we get are a little more tricky to come by.

To have a Mother's Day that is all ours, a day to relax and let someone else take the job for a few hours. A day where we are allowed to sleep in a bit longer. The only day out of the entire year that we will get breakfast in bed. And all the wonderful little trinkets and gifts we will receive that are an exact replica of the personalities of these little people who we have created that stand before us with gleaming smiles from ear to ear. So willing to share with the world that you are in fact, the greatest mom in the world.

That is all wonderful, except for the fact that...all of those tasks require some sort of assistance. To be able to stay in bed that extra little while in the morning, someone else has to be there to help care for the kids. And all the craft projects and personal gifts that each child personally picks out to show just how much they care...it all requires some help from another adult.

What I want to say here is that, just like every other arena of the single mom life, it may take a little extra planning...but how could anyone not enjoy the feelings they experience on Mothers Day?

Cherish every moment...

2007-05-03T18:46:00.000-05:00

My hands were busy through the day,
I didn't have much time to play.
The little games you asked me too,
I didn't have much time for you.

I washed your clothes,
I'd sew and cook,
But when you'd bring your picture book,
And ask me, Please to share your fun,
I'd say, "A little later, hun."

I'd tuck you in all snug at night,
and hear your prayers,
turn out the light.
Then tip-toe softly to the door,
I wished I'd stayed a minute more.

For life is short, the years rush past,
A little girl grown up too fast.
No longer is she at your side,
Her precious secrets to confide.

The picture books are put away,
There are no longer games to play.
No goodnight kiss,
No prayers to hear,
That all belonged to yester year.

My hands once busy, now are still.
The days are long and hard to fill.
I wish I could go back and do,
The little things you asked me too.
~Unknown

Win A Copy of Daddy Needs A Drink

2007-05-01T01:55:00.000-05:00

An irreverent look at parenting from a dad who truly loves his kids... even when they’re driving him nuts!

"DADDY NEEDS A DRINK hits you in the face like a fully loaded diaper. These hilarious tales of fatherhood are both shockingly foul and utterly humane. This is a spectacular book - even if you don't have kids and may never want to. If you do have kids, Robert Wilder will make you feel like you aren't the only one screwing it all up."

Augusten Burroughs, author of Running With Scissors and Magical Thinking

Daddy Needs a Drink, the critically acclaimed book of essays that People magazine said “go down like a gin and tonic on a hot summer afternoon,” is now out in paperback!

And to celebrate the paperback release, Team Daddy is having a “Daddy Needs Your Stories” Father’s Day Contest.

Three winners will receive signed copies of Daddy Needs A Drink mailed to their home (or detention center) just in time for Father’s Day.

For details, rules, and a funny picture of Robert Wilder and his own father, just check out: http://www.robertwilder.com/contest.html

Buy yourself (or someone else) A DRINK

Asking others for help...

2007-04-29T00:12:00.000-05:00

I am not the type of person that asks for much help, ever. It doesn't matter what it is, or how hard or difficult it will be...I would rather find a way to do it myself if at all possible.

However, as I have recently experienced personally, there is at least one area of which a single mom of three must be willing to accept or request assistance. What is it you say?

Hospital stays.

I just recently had my youngest, who is 18 months, stay overnight in the Hospital. She had been sick for 2 days, not able to keep anything down, not even Pedialyte. They prescribed a medicine that was to stop her from getting sick, of which did not help. That was day 1. The next morning I called the doc to let them know that it was not working. They advised me to increase the dosage & it should help. Well, that didn't help either.

It was Saturday evening, of which we were just starting a sleep-over birthday party for my oldest who had just recently turned 8, when Alyssa awoke from her nap with a temp. of 103. I had to take her in to the emergency room, enough is enough. But what to do with my son & his overly excited bunch of friends who had just shown up for the party. As well as my other daughter, who was just waiting to get in on all the fun of her big brothers birthday bash?

Luckily, both my mom & my sister were both here and willing to help. If they had not been here, who knows what I would have had to go through that evening? The baby definitely had to go to the hospital. Yet on the other hand, as any mom knows, it is never easy seeing the disappointment in a child's eyes when you have to take away or delay a very anxiously awaited event.

Everything worked out just fine this go around. Brenden got to have his sleep-over, as my sister stayed to play hostess. Myself & Alyssa stayed overnight at the hospital so she could be hooked up to an IV to replenish fluids.

So even if I like to think that I can do it all...I am finding out that there are just some things that 1 person cannot do alone. And that's okay.

June Cleaver & Martha Stewart step aside...

2007-04-10T23:01:00.000-05:00

I can pretty much guarantee that if you were to walk into my home at any given time, there will be toys from one end of the house to the other. I am okay with that. It used to be that I would follow the kids all day long picking up after them for fear that someone would come over and think, 'what a slob.' That didn't last long.

Life is about so much more than having a home that is entirely too neat & clean. We live here. We play here. This is who we are.

Now don't get me wrong. My house is not "dirty." It may be a bit cluttered at times, and there may be toys on the floor, but all in all, everything is clean.

So, I thought I would share some Quick Tips to Cleaning...

Clean up after yourself (and teach your kids to do the same)--if you put stuff back in it's place as soon as your done using it, you won't have things piling up all over the place. You'll end up having to do it sooner or later, why not now?
Kitchen Duty...If you have a dishwasher, Use It! Anytime someone uses a dish, make it a point that it is rinsed and placed in the dishwasher just as soon as they are done with it. If you make this a habit, especially in your children, it will definitely save you alot of time after supper. Speaking of supper...clean up as you go when cooking, and make it a point to clean the kitchen & dishes as soon as your done with the meal.
Bathroom...quite honestly my least favorite task of all. Everyone has their own way of doing things. I personally keep a spray bottle with Clorox/water handy so that I can spray down the shower/bath tub as we go. It saves me from having to scour for 45 minutes to try to remove the soap scum.
Laundry...Make sure you have enough socks & underwear to last everyone 14 days, then place them all in great big trash bags, stuff in the closet, and make it a family outing to go to the laundry mat every other Sunday. Just joking...buy one of those clothes dividers so that you can sort your laundry as you go. Again, your kids can sort their own as well. Then each morning when I wake up, before I wake the kids for school, I throw in a load of laundry, get them up & ready, off to school. Come home, throw them in the dryer. Go take a shower. Dress. Then fold laundry & put away. All done before 9am.
Multi-Task...Instead of walking from one end of the house to the other empty handed, pick up anything that you find needs to go that direction.

To sum it all up...do it as you go. It will only take a couple extra minutes, sometime a few seconds, to do most of the things I stated above. If you put it off and wait until later to do it, it will most likely take you 30 minutes instead of the 3 minutes had you done it right away. It's also nice to get into a routine of things with your children. It will just become habit for them and will save you the extra work, and the stress later on in life.

So I hope this helps! Housework doesn't have to be hard or time-consuming, the key is to tackle it before it has a chance to get to that point.

How To...clear a clogged sink.

2007-03-25T14:31:00.000-05:00

Here is a very useful tip for anyone who has a clogged sink or toilet or bathtub, any drain you can think of. We all are aware of the many toxic agents available that claim to clear your drains. But have you read the stuff that is in them?? Nothing I want to have in my sink.

There is a simply and very effective way of cleaning slow running or even plugged drains that is much more safe than the products you find on the market today.

Fill a pan with water and add some Dawn dish soap.
Bring it to a boil on the stove.
Pour it down the "problem" drain.
Repeat if needed.

I was amazed at how well it worked. My drains have never flowed like that for as long as I could remember.

Another tip I used that worked as well, involves Baking Soda & Vinegar. Your kids will love to watch this one because it is like a volcano of bubbles that happen as a result of the mixture. I'm not a scientist so I don't know what it is about it that makes it work, but in simple terms, when combined they eat through whatever is blocking the flow in the drain.

Pour some baking soda over the drain.
Follow with the vinegar.
Wait 15 minutes, then flush with cool running water.

I'm not sure if this is good for use on toilets, never tried it, so I don't recommend it.

Oh My Goodness, I laughed so hard...

2007-03-21T00:05:00.000-05:00

The Crash Compilation #7 - The most popular videos are here

My Life, Part 1...teenage years, the trouble I caused...

2007-03-19T22:08:00.000-05:00

There is no responsibility in life greater than the one involved in raising children, period. As a parent, you are constantly questioning whether or not you are doing the right things or making the right decision, it is a never ending battle we have within ourselves and there's no changing that. And no parent ever wants to see their child suffer or get hurt. There is a love parents have for their children that no one can understand completely until they too have had children of their own.

As we all know, we cannot protect our children from everything. They will fall down when they are learning to walk, we have to let them get back up and try it again. That is not so hard to do, right? But, when they get older, let's say teenagers, it's not so easy to know where to draw the line.

My kids are still young, my oldest will be 8 next month, so I have yet to face this issue head on. I will share what I learned through my personal experiences growing up however. The stuff that I put my parents through growing up, oh my goodness!!! Not for the weak.

To sum up a little about me and where I came from...I was born in 1980 at 10lbs. 1oz. From what I have been told, I was a happy, easy going, good baby. (I have to agree, because I am still quite the same...even a little larger than what I probably should be.lol) Life was good. I was later joined by my sister, Brooke, in 1982. She was again, a 10lb. 11oz., big bundle of baby. Our parents weren't wealthy by any means. I can't tell you the exact number of times we moved as we were growing up, but I will say it was alot! All in all, life was good.

My parents seperated when I was in the 5th or 6th grade. My dad was an alcoholic and well my mother liked to drink as well, it was my dad that had the really big problem however. They fought about everything. It was for the best. So my sister and I went to go live with my mom.

I know it's not easy raising kids all by yourself, I myself am doing it right now. My mom worked multiple jobs just to make ends meet. She had not gone to or finished college, so she went to Cosmetology school to get her degree. The school was 30 minutes from where we lived, not easy for a single mom to do. So we moved to where the school was located. I have to say, this is when things changed drastically.

I was just starting middle school, 7th grade, about 12 years old. We had lived in very small towns or in the county my entire life, now we were in a much, much larger city and it was all new to me. I have always been the one who is nice to everyone, I try my hardest and see the good in everyone. It wasn't long after our move when I started hanging out with the "wrong crowd." My mom was at work all the time, it was just me and my sister, so what else was I to do? I cannot tell you everything that I did, but I will tell you this...I did pretty much everything you can think of in regards to what you pray that your children will not do.

I started smoking and skipping school. I had a boyfriend that my mom could care less for. We stole my mom's car one night when she went out of town with one of her boyfriends to pick someone up from the airport, and to top it off, we dropped the clutch and managed to get it home a park it right back where we found it as if nothing had ever happened. (Which by the way, took about 3 days before it was discovered that we did it.) That's when it all started the speedy glide downhill. My mom then started working nights and during the day would do hair in a salon. She was either working or sleeping with no time for me or my sister. I know now that she was trying to do all she could for us, but all I needed and wanted was my mom. If I could have had the chose between living in our car if that's how it had to be or having my mom work day and night just to put a roof over our head, I would have picked living in the car.

To get my mom's attention, I acted out. I was still with the boyfriend that was no good for me and I knew that. But my mom hated it so much, I did it anyways. I would leave at night when she would go to work and go with him, of which my sister would call and tell on me, which would send my mom back home to find me. This went on and on. If my mom wanted me to do something, I did the exact opposite. I even ran away from home on numerous occasions. I didn't want to run away, but I did it anyway. I knew that the relationship I was in was not a good one. Who in their right mind would like to live with no hot water for months at a time, no food in the fridge, in a small run down dirty trailer, where dogs crap all up and down the hallway, so better watch your step. I did it anyway because my mom was so against it.

Then I was forced to go live with my dad. He lived in a small town, about 400 people, and my mom figured I couldn't get into much trouble there. And that it was my dad's turn to step up and be a father. You see, we constantly heard how terrible of a father we had and how he never wanted to see us and that we must not be important enough to him.....This is one thing that I will never, ever do to my children, it does absolutely no good to bad mouth the other parent, especially to your children, no good at all. So I was sent to my dad's and life was ok. I was back in school, good thing I had some sort of intelligence, because I was able to jump back in with no problem. Life was good. I was still with the boyfriend, but my dad said that as long as I told him the truth and what I was doing or who I was with, that I could do pretty much whatever I wanted. He didn't try to "control" my every move and with the freedom and trust we had, I was good. I still drove the hour to go see my boyfriend, but he knew where I was and I would come back home. When my mom found out that I was still seeing him however, she flipped. She came to my dad's house determined to get me put into some sort of detention center for youths. Which by the way, none would take me in because I was not "bad" in terms of breaking the law, I just did things to disobey my mother. This is how my life continued....

It was just after the beginning of my senior year in high school. I was still living with my dad. Life was normal. It was the middle of September of 1997, I believe the 13th, when my boyfriend who I had been with for 4 years, was involved in a car accident with 2 other boys, and none of them survived. It was around 7am and extremely foggy, they were on the highway going to pick up his mom and take her to work when they hit a semi head on. When I heard, I honestly thought my life was over. That is one of the hardest things for a teenage girl to go through and all anyone can do is be there for them. Well again, my mother was not big on holding her tongue as to how she felt about him or his family. My dad let me stay at his mom's house until the funeral, he even brought some flowers and paid his respects to his mother, even shedding tears as well. Because as any parent knows, the loss of a child is the hardest thing you will ever have to go through.

After that was all said and done, I had to move on with my life. I went back up to my dad's and finished my senior year, graduating with my class just as planned. Even with all the school I had missed, I was able to graduate as long as I could stay show that I could keep straight "A's" and that I was at the level needed be in my learning, it also helped that I was advanced in math when I was in 7th grade, I had all my credits needed to graduate there by the time I was in 9th grade. So I graduated in 1998 with a class of 10 girls & 3 boys and it was at the time my greatest achievement in life.

I have since had many other obstacles, of which I will share later. But the point I want to share is this...I can't tell you what your suppose to do, or where we are suppose to draw the line in regards to raising our kids and letting them make their own choices. That's something you will have to decide when the time comes. I will tell you that all you can do is be here for your kids, set a good example and expect them to do their best, that is all that you can do. No one wants to see their children "mess up" or make the wrong decisions in life, but we all have to learn from our mistakes. If we shelter our kids in hopes of protecting them, often times it only drives them away. When you are there to pick up every piece to make things right, they never learn. I knew that I was not in a good relationship, I didn't want that...I also knew that if I gave in, then that would show my mom that she was right and as a teenager, you can't do that. I had to prove that I could do what I wanted and live through it, that I could make my own decisions.

So don't push to hard, but don't be too free either. Let your children make their own decisions, even if they have to fall down a little bit, because all in all, I'm sure you did a pretty good job and they will live and learn and all will turn out just fine.

Find the Time for Mama, free ebook

2007-03-11T15:56:00.000-05:00

Being a single parent, your sense of self-respect and fulfillment as a person creates the anchor your children need. It will give your children more security than any amount of attention. So it is important to make time for yourself, and put yourself first in line. A happy mom is a loving, caring mom.

Another Time Saving Tip- Supper

2007-03-11T00:49:00.000-06:00

To save a HUGE amount of time, and thought. Set up a weekly menu of what you will have for dinner each night. This will allow you to only have to visit the store once, which will save an enormous amount of time in itself.

This will save you both time and money. If you think about the time it takes to go through a drive-thru, go back home, eat and clean up. It's takes the same amount of time if not longer then if you cook a meal at home, that by the way is much healthier anyway.

If you don't already own one, get a Crock Pot! Simple to use, just fill it up and leave it sit all day until it's time for supper. Then eat and clean up. That's it. It typically takes 10-15 min. in the morning to get everything prepared, and supper is done. Great for schedule packed, extra-curricular activity days.

Setting a Daily Schedule

2007-03-11T00:08:00.000-06:00

Oh the importance of setting a daily schedule!

If only I would have done this sooner? But no, I thought that my kids would not take to it very well, and to imagine the time it would take to get it all together, I just didn't have the time. Right? Trust me on this one! The only way to keep your sanity and ease the day to day stress that is associated with raising your children all by yourself, then you definately want to sit down and create a schedule right now!

It doesn't have to be "concrete" right now. Just start with an outline. You will need to make adjustments as you go, and as you are working your schedule into your everyday life. When you finally have it pretty much set to a routine that is easy for everyone to do without putting pressure on anyone, then that's your schedule I would stick with.

Here is what our schedule looks like...

6:30am-Wake up! and get ready for school.
7:30am-Off to school.
8-10am-OPEN (Feed Alyssa, play, baths, minor cleaning, etc.)
10-12am-WORK (only calls, no email, no internet, only dialing!)
Noon-2:30pm-Lunch & Open (Grocery shopping, errands, household, etc.)
3pm-Kids from school.
3-4pm-Snack & homework or reading
4-5pm-Kids free time (Most often, PBS kids on tv)
5-7pm-I start supper, we pick up the house, eat, then it's time to play a game or any family activity together.
7pm-Showers & Brush teeth (Get ready for bed)
7:30pm-Bed Time
8:00pm- MOMMY TIME!

Before I finally decided to sit down and set up a schedule, it would seem like the day would never end, and when it did I felt as though I got nothing accomplished. Being a work at home mom made it even more difficult. There was constant guilt, when I was working I felt I should be with the kids, and when I was with the kids, I should have been working. I know that between 10-12 everyday that I will do nothing but work. I am able to focus more and that in itself is huge. I also have the evening to work as the kids are in bed early enough to get some calls in as well.

I no longer have to fight the kids to get them to bathe or brush their teeth. They are the ones that watch the clock and let me know when it is getting close to bedtime. As well as what comes next throughout the day. Another good idea is to have a rewards chart for them to "mark" their daily tasks. For example, Brush teeth (morn & night) Shower, Get dressed alone, Pick up, Homework, and I let them pick something they would like to work on as well, such as being patient. Then have some sort of reward each week for a job well done. You will find that your kids will work extra hard to complete their tasks in order to fill it up and reap the reward.

So right now, get out a paper and pen and start your daily schedule. You will be so glad that you did.

Alone time? Could you repeat the question please?

2007-03-05T23:02:00.000-06:00

As a single mom I have "accepted" the fact that having time all to myself is just not going to happen, for now anyway. I love my kids like I have never loved before, but love has nothing to do with wanting, actually needing time to yourself. To have a completely quiet, peaceful moment to just sit and think and relax.

Not when your the sole caretaker and provider to 3 overly energetic little ones. A nice, long bubble bath before bed is replaced with a rubber ducky and 20 minutes of mopping up a wet floor. And the quick run to the grocery store because you forget bread? Yeah right?? (You best have a list so nothing is forgotten!!)

There was a time when I too questioned whether or not I could do this. It is often taken for granted having someone else around to stay with the kids so you can run out really quick. Or if you get an important phone call but the kids decide it's time to run hysterically all over the house. (And yes, this happens most often right after you answer the phone) There is no one there to turn to for help. That's OK because you can do this. If you couldn't then it would not be placed in front of you to do so.

Your kids don't have some sort of plot conspired to make your life as hectic as possible, they're just kids. They need your attention and guidance. They need to know what they are suppose to do. Don't focus on what you wish you could do or the fact that there is not enough time in the day to get everything done, it can wait.

My advice to get the very much needed "you time" is this. Have a daily routine/schedule set up and stick to it. You may even be suprised at how easily they will adapt. My children actually started reminding me when it would be close to bed time. (Which I might add is 7:30 on school nights)

This is where I have regained "me time." From that time on, I can do as I wish. No screaming, no interruptions, just time to think. Right now it's time to do this to share with everyone.

I also wouldn't give up all the smiles, and the hugs, and the first steps or getting a perfect score on the weekly spelling test. It's moments like this when you realize what it all is for.

Love them, they are only little once!

Just for starters...

2007-03-01T19:59:00.000-06:00

I would like to start by welcoming you to my very first blog.

I'm not completely sure of how things will play out exactly, but I do know that it could be a very interesting ride. Why you ask? Because my life is interesting to say the least. You will never be the same after you've been here for awhile. I plan to share my story, who I am, where I have been and what I have had to climb to get here. Life is not always easy, it's not suppose to be. I can honestly say that I am thankful for all of the little, and the huge, obstacles that I have had to overcome. (I'm sure there will be plenty more?!?!) Without challenges, I would have never grown into the person I am today.

I have 3 beautiful children of which are my greatest pride and joy. They are the reason I get up in the morning, they are why I push harder every day. They are my light, my love and my strength.

We will say good-bye for now...Be sure to check back often. I will be adding new stuff all the time. I have wasted too many thoughtless hours trying to figure out where to start, and what I should say and what if.......I'm sure many can relate. So I decided to just go for it. I know that I have so much to share, now all I need is to find someone that will listen.

Also I would love for you to leave some feedback, let me know what you think? What should I write about? What do you want to know? Do you have challenges? Maybe we can take this walk together?

Take care until next time....